Pick things and get a curse.

To play innocently outside. (You might get stung.)

To be comfortable with your sexuality. (Your parents still won’t accept you.)

To only hurt the normal amount. (Maybe then you’ll be easier to understand.)

To stop holding onto the past. (The memories haunt you still.)

To not flinch when someone raises their hand. (They will still hurt you.)

To never have picked up the blade. (You know you still will.)

To find peace in the scars. (People will give you weird looks still.)

To have a good relationship with food. (The scale is still there.)

An apology. (Do they really mean it?)

To be able to warn your younger self. (They won’t listen.)

For God to be real and repent for what He’s done to you. (The fear of Hell is still there.)

To be good enough for your parents. (They seem disappointed.)

For you to stop saying, “One More Cut.” (Your skin is destroyed.)

For it all to be over. (Do you know what happens after death?)

Your father’s love. (It feels foreign.)

To be happy again. (It won’t last long.)

To not feel left out all the time. (They do it on purpose.)

The ability to forgive them. (You will never forget.)

To smell home one more time. (It was never truly home.)

To finally know what’s wrong with you. (It still doesn’t make you feel better.)

To finally love yourself. (Exactly the way you are.)

For you birthday to feel happy again. (You’re still one year closer to death.)

To undo your past. (It still will haunt you.)

A genuine hug. (You can still feel their hands on you.)

Pick what gender you were born as. (They will still misgender you.)

To save your mother. (You both get hit.)

To feel attractive. (Are you really?)

To grow up in a quiet home. (The yelling doesn’t start.)